“Call your homegirl” – the second “C” in G.U.C.C.I. as it relates to our past blog “Single? 5 New & Easy Ways to be G.U.C.C.I. With It!” and the main topic for this blog. We will discuss the importance of leaning on your homegirl(s) when feeling lonely due to being single.
Firstly, as a Black woman, I recognize that being single can be a difficult and lonely experience. The funny but not-so-funny thing is that many of us strive to do things alone – to be independent and self-sufficient (for understandable reasons). But while this has many benefits, it can also be a curse for Black women who may struggle to find a balance between their desire for companionship and their need for personal growth and fulfillment.
As a Black woman, I also know firsthand how hard it can be to navigate this world alone, given that we deal with so much daily, from systemic racism to micro-aggressions. It can all pile up and make us feel isolated and alone. Thus, I recognize that connecting with friends and, even more so, your homegirl(s) can help alleviate some of the negative feelings associated with being single.
But what really is a homegirl?
- She provides emotional support during times of stress or difficulty. She can lend a listening ear, offer advice, and be a source of comfort and encouragement.
- She makes you laugh, lifts your spirits and brings joy to your life.
- She shares experiences with you, such as attending events, traveling, or trying new things. These things strengthen your bond and create lasting memories.
- She offers honest feedback, gives you constructive criticism, and holds you accountable when necessary.
- She can offer different perspectives than your own and challenges your thinking.
- She knows you best, sees you for who you truly are, and will always have your back.
- Guess what? Even if she isn’t presently single, I’m sure she could say, “Been there, done that!” meaning she can empathize with what you’re experiencing.
Now that you’ve identified your homegirl(s), let’s continue…
When you feel lonely, don’t be afraid to call your homegirl(s). Hit up that group chat, plan a girls’ night, or contact them for a heart-to-heart. Sometimes all it takes is a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on to make you feel less alone.
And let’s say you are single, lonely, swiping on Hinge, and going on numerous failed dates. Your homegirl(s) would be perfect to commiserate with and help you laugh through tough times.
But it’s not just about having fun or blowing off steam – leaning on our homegirl(s) can help you deal with deeper issues. They can offer support, advice, and a listening ear, whether it’s mental health struggles, family problems, or career concerns.
Of course, it’s important to remember that friendships are a two-way street. Just as we rely on our homegirl(s) for support, they depend on us too. So ensure you’re also there for your girls when they need you.
And let’s say you’ve developed personal boundaries and don’t want the ones closest to you to know your personal business; then there are these options:
- Join a support group: One way to connect with other women struggling with being single is to join a support group. These groups can provide a safe and supportive space to share your experiences and feelings. They can also offer practical advice and resources for coping with the challenges of being single.
- Use social media: Platforms like Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter can be powerful tools for connecting with others. Join online groups or communities focused on topics you are interested in, such as self-care, independence, and love. A quick look on Facebook, and I was able to find this group.
Just know cultivating a solid support network allows you to find companionship, support, and joy even when you dislike being single.