*Note: Going on solo dates benefits everyone; however, as a Black woman, I am writing from my experience, an experience I believe I share with other Black women.
This blog is a follow-up to the most recent blog, “Single? 5 New & Easy Ways to be G.U.C.C.I. With It!” specifically as it relates to the G in “G.U.C.C.I.” – “get out.” It was referring to going on solo dates. So, if you haven’t read that blog, be sure to do so.
As I write this blog, I want to ensure that I am not being hypocritical and am transparent. This blog will discuss the importance and benefits of Black women going on solo dates. However, I have never been on a solo date. When I learned the importance of it and built up the courage to go on one, I found myself in a relationship with my current partner and no longer feeling the need to follow through. I want to say that this was not the wisest decision and that I now see solo dates as not just beneficial for single Black women but all Black women.
now let us get into the benefits of solo dates!
As a Black woman, I know all too well the first-hand nature, but more so nurture, to prioritize the needs of others and pour all of our energy into serving others and neglecting ourselves. The “Strong Black Woman” narrative (which many of us fall trapped in and I hope to discuss soon) does not leave room for us to show vulnerability. In a world that often seems to be working against us, it is crucial to take time to nurture ourselves and our well-being. Solo dates can be one of the most beneficial and empowering ways to do so.
Going on solo dates is an act of self-love, self-acceptance, self-confidence, and independence. Going against our nature sends a powerful message that we are worthy of love and care – both from ourselves and others. It can be daunting to spend time alone, but it’s an excellent way to learn to rely on yourself and trust your instincts. By pushing yourself out of your comfort zone and doing things alone, you prove that you are capable and don’t need anyone else to validate your worth.
Another benefit of solo dates is that they help us build a strong relationship with ourselves and cultivate a more profound sense of self-awareness. When we spend time alone, we have the space and freedom to reflect on our thoughts, feelings, and desires. You can use the time to set goals, plan out your future, or process any emotions.
Ultimately it is a powerful tool for self-discovery, helping you understand who you are, what you want, and how you can live your life in a way that aligns with your values and priorities. This act can be valuable for Black women who may have experienced trauma or face the pressures of societal expectations and stereotypes as it allows us to heal and grow in a safe and supportive environment – support meaning yourself.
As Black women, we also often face unique challenges and pressures that can be exhausting, so going on a solo date can provide an opportunity to recharge, reset and reconnect with yourself. It allows you to disconnect from the outside world, take a break from the demands of daily life and focus on your wants and needs without the distraction of others. Whether trying a new restaurant, visiting a local museum, or taking a long nature walk, solo dates allow you to immerse yourself fully in the experience without worrying about anyone else’s expectations or opinions.
If you want to attend a restaurant, I’d suggest Louix Louis as their service is absolutely excellent. You’d definitely leave there feeling like a million bucks.
Furthermore, a solo date can be an opportunity for personal growth and development. It can challenge us to try new things. As Black women, we may have internalized beliefs about what we can or cannot do or what we “should” be interested in. By pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones and trying something new, we can break down these limiting beliefs and discover new passions and interests.
In short, solo dates are a valuable part of self-care for Black women (and everyone else!). They allow us to prioritize our own needs and wants, build self-awareness and confidence, and disconnect from the outside world for a little while. So, the next time you feel overwhelmed or need “me” time, don’t be afraid to plan a solo date for yourself. You deserve it!
Note: I’ll make sure I hold myself accountable by following through with my suggestion to you by going out on a solo date. Once I follow through, I’ll make sure to blog about my experience.